50 Signs He's a Pretty Boy

12:07:00 AM

Let me just state that if I call you a "pretty boy" it's not exactly a compliment.  Some girls are into pretty boys, but I would take a handsome man over that any day.  While individually these factors don't make you a pretty boy, a hefty combination might warrant some concern.

1.  He matches his underwear to the color of his shirt. 

2. He applies more than 3 products to his face per day.

3. He often asks you for "lip balm."

4. He weighs himself more often than you do.
5. He owns more than 4 different colognes.
6. He has more than 1 mirror in his bedroom.
7. He uses a nail file in public.

8.  Tank tops are a staple in his wardrobe.

9. He has never been camping his life. 

10. He eats or drinks disgusting concoctions to improve his skin, hair and nails.
11.  Two words: White pants.  This guy is going to be afraid of getting dirty.  You really think he would get on his hands and knees to help you change a flat tire!???  Don't kid yourself.
12. He takes photobooth or webcam photos of himself with his best "sexy pout."  Tool!
13. He is too embarrassed to wear basketball shorts outside of the gym.
14. He goes to the bathroom on a dinner date just to check himself out.

15. When he takes you shopping he spends more time shopping for himself than enjoying his time with you.
16. He untags himself in 50% of his facebook photos because he "looks bad."
17.  He edits blemishes on his face on iphoto or photoshop.
18. He has a weak handshake-- so telling.
19. He says, "I need to moisturize."
20.  He knows if his coloring is autumn, winter, etc.
21. He uses a blow dryer religiously.
22. He highlights his hair. 
23. He refuses to make a funny face on camera.
24. He won't walk outside to the mailbox barefoot.
25. He complains of being cold more than his girlfriend does.
26. His dress shoes have tassels on them.
27.  He'd rather have a grilled chicken breast than a big juicy steak.
28. He doesn't collect guns, he collects designer sunglasses.
29. He takes photos of himself on his phone or camera to see how he looks.
30. He would rather whiten his teeth than make out with you.  Come on ladies, this is a dead giveaway.
31. He puts oil on his body at the beach.... his hairless body.
32. He fails the mirror test.  Put yourself between him and a mirror.  If he looks at you, then you're in the clear.  If his eyes consistently become glued to the mirror (himself), then consider him self-absorbed.
33. He works out his upper body but never his lower body.  This means he works out for shallow reasons-- his appearance.  He wants to look jacked at first glance.
34.  He doesn't play contact sports because he's afraid of getting bruised.
35. He showers more than 3 times a day.

36. He buys two pairs of the same shoes, one for indoors and one for outdoors.

37. He has sent you a photo of himself shirtless after working out.
38.  He acts intensely homophobic.
39. He drinks diet soda.
40. He chooses cocktails over whiskey.
41.  He'd rather have a Maltipoo than a German Shepherd.
42.  He keeps a lint roller in his car.
43. He only wears certain designers.
44. His main reason for going to the beach is to get tan.
45.  His best pick up line is, "Oh, is that Gucci?"
46.  You ask him about his 5 year plan, and he mentions Lasik and Rogaine.
47.  The 20 year plan features Viagra and a BMW.
48.  He often borrows your hair gel and cuticle oil.
49.  He says he's waiting to be discovered by a talent agency.
50. He's great at tweezing his own eyebrows. 


Agree or disagree?
XOXO,
Dylan

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