I'm so blessed to be able to bring my boyfriend back to Minnesota for Christmas this year. He has met my parents, but now he will get to meet my sister, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends. I'm so excited for all of the Christmas festivities (and hopefully there will be snow!). I've come up with a bunch of fun, Christmas-y things to do over the next month with your sweetheart....
1. Sponsor a child together through the Salvation Army's Angel Tree Program. Pick a number from the tree with the child's name, age, and gender, and shop for the child together.
2. Make Christmas cookies together for your bosses and coworkers.
3. Make DIY ornaments together. I still have some ornaments that my parents made 30+ years ago when they were first married and had little money. The ornaments you make now will hold precious memories.
4. Go sit on Santa's lap together and get a photo.
5. Attend a local church's Christmas choir concert.
6. Go on a Christmas Lights Driving Tour through nice neighborhoods. Google it to find some great routes in your area.
7. Make a DIY wreath for your front door. Pinterest has tons of ideas.
9. Go Ice Skating during a slow time at the rink where it will be more intimate and less o-m-g-there-are-kids-everywhere.
10. Volunteer at a nursing home or hospital to do a Christmas activity with the patients like decorating Christmas cookies or making Christmas cards for their family members.
11. Host a party together! Hosting a party by yourself can be stressful, but together you can make it a fun learning experience. Work together to plan the menu, cook, decorate and facilitate the fun.
12. Go Christmas caroling door-to-door with a group. At first this can feel awkward or intimidating, but once you get a few rounds under your belt it can be hilarious and fun.
13. Celebrate St. Nicholas Day and leave your shoes outside on the night of December 5th! Fill them with treats and pretend you don't know how they got there the next day. Learn more here.
14. Send out Christmas cards as a couple.
15. Be the FUN couple at get-togethers. We all know those couples who are just F-U-N. They always add excitement to ordinary occasions. They spice things up. They get people out of their shells. Vow to do this at your next holiday gathering. Bring a game, plan an activity, pull out a selfie stick, or pass out some strong Christmas cocktails.
16. Cozy up in a carriage ride through the city. Hello, romance.
17. Watch a marathon of classic Christmas movies together. Then watch a marathon of low-budget Christmas movies on Hallmark/Lifetime.
18. Share each other's home movies and photos from your childhood Christmases.
19. Find a dark place out in the countryside on the night of the Winter Solstice (December 22nd). Light a candle together to celebrate that sooner the days will be getting longer. This was my mom's contribution to this post..
Love,
Dylan
For the past 8 years my best friends and family members have been 1200+ miles away. While I've made great friends in this time, you can never replace your childhood best friends and your family. Maintaining the closeness is a huge challenge. You'll often feel like you're not doing enough. You'll feel guilty. You'll feel like a bad friend, a bad son/daughter, or a bad sibling. The best way to successfully maintain these relationships is to be efficient and strategic with your efforts. Use the approach that speaks to them. Use their love language. There are 5 love languages... 1) Words of Affirmation, 2) Acts of Service, 3) Receiving Gifts, 4) Quality Time, and 5) Physical Touch. What does your loved one respond best to? Hint: It's usually how they tend to express love to others, too.
If it's Words of Affirmation....
1. Send them encouraging quotes or positive words that remind you of them.
2. Send them quick emails and texts throughout the day.
3. Always offer positive encouragement and build them up in phone conversations.
4. Say or write how much you miss them.
5. Give them fabulous public shout outs on Facebook or Instagram on their birthday or surrounding big life events and accomplishments.
6. Make sure to give and take in conversations equally. Don't center the conversation around yourself.
7. Send them cards in the mail that would speak to them.
8. Write sweet letters or notes with heartfelt words.
9. When they're going through challenges or stressful circumstances, send them quotes, Bible verses, and other positive words of encouragement.
If it's Acts of Service...
1. Offer to help them research things they are interested in.
2. Help them find inexpensive flights to come visit you.
3. Send them links of things they have been shopping for or trying to find online.
4. If they need help with a task, help coordinate another family member or friend to be there.
5. If they are struggling to solve a problem, figure out some possible solutions and offer up your ideas.
6. If your parents are elderly or sick, offer to help manage their bills, investments, finances, and filing taxes.
**Service is not only physical labor. You can serve others with your time, energy, wisdom and problem solving from afar.
If it's Receiving Gifts...
1. Send them surprises of things they've been struggling to find online/in stores. Amazon Prime is great.
2. Send them books that you think they would appreciate or find interesting.
3. Give them a magazine or newspaper subscription that you know they would enjoy.
4. Give them a subscription to a monthly box type of program (i.e. Birch Box, Stitch Fix, Bark Box, and more). Check out a whole list of subscription boxes here: Subscription Ideas
5. Send them gift certificates to mani/pedi's, Starbucks, Chipotle, or even a cleaning service like Merry Maids.
6. Send them little things like candy, chapstick, or earrings when you find things that make you think of them.
7. When you come across coupons that the person may use, email/mail them to them.
8. Send the person something of yours to remind them of you (i.e. a shirt, your favorite necklace, or a little trinket).
If it's Quality Time...
1. Dedicate time to focus on them each week or month on the phone or Skype.... no multi-tasking, just quality time.
3. Pick a TV series that you both enjoy and take time to talk about each episode.
4. Read the same book at the same time and take time to discuss.
5. Share in an online church service together.
6. When you do get to see them in person, make sure there is 1:1 time where you can be together without distractions. Do things that they enjoy doing.
7. Consider surprising them with a surprise visit if you're able to travel.
If it's Physical Touch...
1. Good luck with that one.
But in all seriousness, long-term long-distance is hard. And it's easy to feel like you're falling short. Try to identify which love language speaks to each of your family members and friends and focus your energy and efforts on their strongest language. They'll feel much more connected.
Love Love Love,
Dylan
I remember the first time I spent a Thanksgiving alone. I felt a little sad and embarrassed for not having plans. But sometimes circumstances prevent you from spending Thanksgiving with family, friends or a significant other. After a few Thanksgivings on my own, I grew to enjoy it. Rather than feeling sad here are some ways to make Thanksgiving special on your own.
1. Sleep in as long as your brain wants to.
2. Watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.
3. Make "cozy" your mantra for the day. Lounge around in your most comfortable clothes.
4. Make a pancake breakfast just for yourself.
5. Talk to your family on the phone.
6. Make yourself something special to eat. It can be whatever you would enjoy. Dominoes pizza counts.
7. Watch a marathon of holiday movies on the Lifetime Network or Hallmark channel.
8. Volunteer at soup kitchen or homeless shelter. Or simply take a walk around the city and hand out socks or gloves.
9. Spend quality time with your pet while watching the Westminster Dog Show.
10. Bake Christmas cookies and freeze them in anticipation of when you will see your family.
11. While you're at it make cookies for your neighbors or landlord.
12. Get outside and be thankful for the world around you. Go for a walk somewhere you haven't been.
13. Put together your Christmas cards and mail them out.
14. Assess your 2015 New Year's Resolutions. We're in the middle of Q4... time to hussle on those! #goals?
15. Put on some festive music and decorate your house for the holidays.
16. Make some DIY Pinterest ornaments.
17 Pre-plan your Black Friday shopping route.
18. On that note, add things to your online shopping carts for a quick and easy Black Friday check out.
19. Sign up for a 5K Turkey Trot in your local area... if you're feeling ambitious.
20. Write down all of the things you are thankful for. Make an effort to send a thank you note to people who might not realize their impact on your life.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Love,
Dylan
Why haven't I posted in a while?
Because... I'm moving to San Diego! My boyfriend, Wes, is getting relocated to Point Loma, and I'll be joining him.
I'm down to my last two weeks at Zulily in Seattle. It's been quite the ride. I love Seattle, but I am so ready for this next adventure.
My close friends and family will tell you that I've always dreamed of living in California. I dream about having my own palm tree, going for walks on the beach, driving along the PCH, and breathing in that California air. California makes my soul feel happy and alive. It always has. I hoped to move to California after high school. I was wait-listed at Stanford and ended up on the opposite side of the country at William and Mary in Virginia. I slowly moved west, first to Las Vegas to work for Zappos and then Seattle to work for Zulily.
Finally, the time has come. January 2016! San Diego! It's happening! While I still need to finalize the job, I'm optimistic and working diligently on some possibilities. More to come on all of this.
Love,
Dylan